Update!

4 years have passed.. I have however rediscovered a passion for writing about food!

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I have just moved back to my home city of Edinburgh after 9 years in Brighton. My passion in life is food. I eat food, I cook food, I read about food and I work with food. Mostly all I talk about is food - and I must be honest - sometimes I preach about food....

Moving back to Edinburgh after so long is a dream come true, I have been excited about exploring my fabulous city as an adult for many years. However as a newbie to the city - I feel lost!

"No, I dont know that pub..."
"What street is that on?...Oh, where is that?"
"What did it used to be called?"

I grew up in Edinburgh, so I am forever being asked by visiting friends where the cool places to go are. This is my mission - to be able to answer this question and to show off the fabulously quirky, interesting and unique side of Edinburgh. Essentially to find somewhere good to take my friend Adam...

Friday 20 May 2011

Time for Tea


I could make excuse after excuse for the 6 month gap in my blog; writers block, self-imposed bribery or a life of mediocrity. In truth I am lazy and sometimes life gets in the way of writing about it! I have, however, been enthused by the need to right a wrong.

Coffee shops have reigned for well over a decade, almost turning the tea drinking Brits into coffee connoisseurs. I, like most, developed a taste for grande, skinny, half-caf, wet cappuccino with extra foam and cinnamon* and learnt what seems to be a whole new language with a different dialect for every brand. I used to do the teenager tut and whiny "Mum" when she would ask for a 'tea', not a Chai Latte, but Tetley. As always, it turns out that Mother knows best; perhaps not on the Tetley front, but with her hard and fast loyalty to the traditional brew. Tea Houses have continued to exist on the fringes throughout the coffee dynasty, I know this, as I used to go to Eastbourne regularly. Visited by some as a kitsch act of rebellious cool, traditional tea shops usually guaranteed of a hot drink that would not empty your purse/overdraft. Since my return to Edinburgh, I have seen a new breed of the Ye Olde Tea Shoppe sweeping the city. The kitsch market is very much played to and places like Eteaket and Loopy Lorna's have been rewarded with their hoards of trendy twenty-something's and yummy-mummies. Tea shops have also worked out if you liberate the tea from the bag you can charge more! Best extend that overdraft before tea time... Oh and you will need to learn a new language -'tea' just won't cut it any more (you will even have to refine your green and herbal ideas...)

On the site of the old Morningside institution, 'Sherry's', Loopy Lorna's opened up. It is shocking pink and fabulously decorated; tea served in pots with cups and saucers and homemade cakes; it looked amazing and I hated it on sight. Now I could justify this hate with a bunch of crap about how it is sad that something real had to be replaced with a parody to survive, almost like reality is not good enough, we all must go to virtual - but it boils down to jealousy. Through my glowing green eyes, all I could see was something that I would like to own and my business brain was telling that it could never happen now as my niche had been nicked! I live on the other side of Edinburgh so have not had to purposely avoid it, it has just conveniently happened, until yesterday.

I have visited Eteaket on Frederick Street many times, with different people and we have always enjoyed it. When a friend, Nargis, suggested that we meet at Loopy Lorna's, I reluctantly agreed. If I could get passed my jealousy, perhaps this would be another gem. The service was friendly, if a little over keen, at first I was a little disappointed by the selection of teas, I have obviously been ruined by Eteaket, but at least it made my choice easier so that by the third or fourth visit by the waitress I was able to order. Over the last few days I have been craving a proper piece of caramel shortcake, thick biscuit with nice set, but not to hard caramel just right to stand up to the snap of the chocolate from the first bite.... (drool on keyboard), so I ordered a piece. Nargis ordered a cupcake, which looked pretty, but on the Primark side of the designer cake scale. I had been open with Nargis about my predisposition to dislike Lorna's, so I was relieved when she started the criticism. Ok, it may have been in response to my comment about the bloom on the chocolate - but come on I worked in a chocolate shop for 11 years, I'm gonna call a spade a spade! Bloomed chocolate and a stale cupcake - both signs that the 'Loopy' may refer to their storage and shelf life policies. For a total cost of £4.90 for the cakes I would expect a higher level of freshness and of course them to be hand delivered by angels.

Digression: Tea Shops provide an interesting social anthropological microcosm; in the present and historically. Always the domain of the woman, the tea shop provided a respectable meeting place before it was acceptable to go to a gastro pub and quaff a bottle or so of Pinot. Today it seems that women are now choosing tea over wine, probably a good thing in our booze binge society. Something else that I have noticed about the tea shop is that people are talking, sometimes even cross-generational conversation! This is certainly a phenomenon unique to tea. Coffee shops are the land of the semi-dead with their vampiric need for their fix. Eyes are on the floor; broadsheet; latest igadget; conversation is at a minimum and generally between tired mums feeding little precious a 'babycino'' or the busy business types who have no time in their important schedule to wait for a cup of tea to brew. Lorna's actually offer a free refill of hot water on your tea leaves so you can linger (and no doubt so they can justify their prices!) Tea shops are also offering lots of different people the chance to enjoy a relaxing afternoon tea - something that traditionally would be for the more posh clientele - now enjoyed by students! This is a British food institution that I am happy is having a renaissance, it is an important part of our food heritage. My concern is, however, that the food is not always the main focus.

After years of lengthy and complicated coffee ordering, it has now become a case of offering the consumer choice, choice and more choice, resulting in the tea shop becoming more focused on the tea. I am aware of how ridiculous this statement sounds, it's a tea shop, of course it is all about the tea... Historically tea, was of course, tea and did not necessitate an extensive menu describing the high and low notes of flavour, therefore the quality of the scone in different establishments was of the highest importance. From a cream tea, to high tea and afternoon tea - there has always been a bit of something on the plate beside the saucer. In fact, in many parts of the UK the definition of 'tea' has transcended the refreshing drink and has became all about the food. We must also consider that in days gone by, many had the ability and time to bake - the goods in the tea shops were going to be expected to live up to a certain standard. In todays fast pace of life for many the word 'fresh' refers to the fact that it was put in a paper bag in front of you as apposed to in plastic on the shelf. There are a lot of people who do know what nice home baking should be like; it may not always look perfect but the taste is unbeatable, why does it appear that Loopy Lorna's is getting away with sub-standards?! This place is revered and yes it is pretty and pink (I do however judge them on their 'step-to-far-not-kitsch-now-tacky' tea-cozies) but it appears to me to be all fur coat and no knickers (or all monkey tea-cozy and no bone china). What I am trying to say is that my caramel shortcake was horrid. I know that my previous description probably sounds like I had unreasonably high expectations, but I would have settled for nice. The base was soft, crumbly - sorry powdery, and tasted like raw flour making it actually inedible. The caramel was not proper caramel, it was shortcut caramel, a boiled can of condensed milk - which you can get away with if the rest of the cake balances it. As for the chocolate - they have used real chocolate as apposed to cooking chocolate or chocolate flavoured coating, which is a good thing, but if you are doing this you must sell the cakes within at most 2 days so that the fat crystals do not bloom and turn the chocolate white. (I must explain that this in itself is a purely cosmetic blip and would not effect the flavor.) Why have the concern enough for taste/ingredients to go to the extra expense of using real chocolate, if you don’t have the respect enough for the finished product to reach the customer at its best. But in fairness - at £2.95 a pop, no wonder it is still sitting there days later! I have eaten at Eteaket and have always enjoyed the food, the portions are generous for the price, my friend Adam was shocked to get two big scones with his cream tea! The sandwiches and cakes are served on dainty vintage china - but are far from dainty in themselves - my skyscraper slice of carrot cake was hanging off the edge! When it is tea time there are no prizes for guessing where you will find me!


*Note for self-respect:  a tall drip will see me through the day, just do not try to pass an Americano off as a filter it is NOT the same thing!